A day of camping
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Hey! What's up mate?
Heey! I was just wondering if the plan still stands.
Do you mean the camping? Sure!
But showers seem likely tomorrow. Don't you think?
Really? Let me check it. I'll set the weather forecast on my new TV set.
Put TV3. I like it.
TV3...are you kiding, aren't you?
Oh yeah yeah! Of course!
I'll set Canal 9. I think they are more reliable.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha
Hold on! Fashion models!
Do you want to lick my lollipop?
What a wonderful suit
he's wearing!
With a
beautiful stripped 100% cotton shirt
and holding over his shoulder
a fashionable jacket.
Perfect outfit
for a glamorous event.
Attention gentleman
because a beautiful girl
is coming next.
She's wearing
a long leather coat
that lents her
sort of a gothic air.
And she shows it off
with an elegant
and
so beautiful pace.
Admire his sensuality!
I...I mean
her...her sens...
her??
His...her...
Whatever!
And now we are showing
a casual set of clothes
ideal for everyday life.
The model adorns the picture
with a huge spotted handbag
which is the trend...
which is the trend in Japan.
He's also wearing
a woolen patterned scarf
very according with the setting.
And a tight skirt.
And a pair of shoes
and a hanger
a book
a tampon
a razor
a bottle
and a Mexican hat!!
CAN I TRHOW HIM THE MICROPHONE?
Pleeeasee....
No? Ok...
And...
there she goes again
the last girl
for tonight.
Oh my God...
Eventually
she happend to be he!
Keep on looking.
For my daughter
I kill
I KILL!!
And I'm very happy
with my program
MY PROGRAM
Do you understand me??
And I am
the princess of the town!!
the PRINCESE
of the town!
Is it clear?
And I ssspeak like this
porque me sale del chirri!
Vale?
Andreita
eat the chicken!!
eat the chicken!!
Aaahh!!
Change it! Change it!
What a monster!
Calm down. Calm down.
It's gone, it's gone.
And these are the news in a minute.
The windmills of La Mancha are in great danger.
Very reliable sources have informed us
that Don Quijote has been seen walking around with Sancho.
We're very worried about the donkey.
it seems not to have eaten for a long time.
A boy has been
abducted by some aliens
after he set off for school this morning.
We're very very worried
about the aliens
that boy was Lady Gaga.
Alejandro....Alejandro...
And the consume of cocaine
is alarmingly rising
in the US.
The reason is still
a mystery.
Dozens of children had been lately disappearing in the US.
Don't be afraid
and keep calm.
Forces of order have everything under control.
Right now they are sending us
a picture of the main suspect.
We're sorry, we're very sorry
but there must be a mistake.
Let's contact with the police chief
in charge of the investigation.
Sir...
Can you hear us?
You have stated that you've found
the main suspect, haven't you?
And...is this the picture of him?
But...Chief...
you know Michael Jackson died...
don't you?
Dead people cannot kidnap children....
Ok, let's cut it off...
we won`t get much more information about it.
Mmmm...every time I see these news
they are more implausible...
You are right...!
And let's take our next call.
Hello?
- Hello!
What's your name?
- Hi, I'm George.
George, hello George, how are you?
- Fine, thanks!
- Ahmm...I'm excited.
And very please that you've answered my call by the way
Delighted, I should say.
I'm glad,
what can we do for you?
- Well...
I'd like to...I'd like you to help me
because I want to win a girl's heart.
Oh...how cute!
Well...tell us your story.
Who is her...? Do you know her...?
Does she know you like her...? What?
Ok, she doesn't know anything.
She's very keen on animals
and I had thought about giving her a hamster for her birthday.
Which is the next week.
Ahmm...
I'm a bit afraid, though, nervous, cause...
she...she may refuse my proposal.
But...but if she does not
a friend of mine, Fred, has promised me
that he...hehe
he'll lend me his house.
Well...very generous from...
from Fred.
Your friend Fred...
Well...so...let's see if we can help you.
I'm thinking about...
What do you think about preparing a song for her?
Sure!
Yeah, let's do that!
We'll prepare a song.
Somebody will help us.
My friend, this is my friend, the guitar.
And...
you have to make the song with me.
Ok.
Yeah, this is the, this is the thing:
I'll set the rhyme
and you have to finish the rhythm of the sentences ok?
I mean...you have to look for the word that fits best.
All right!
Let's try, ok?
Ok.
You'll get it.
It has to be a happy song...
don't you think?
Yeah, why not?
Well...let's see...
Let's go!
♪ I'll give you for your birthday what I guess you'll love
that is a little mouse.
♫ And I'll prepare a dinner, a romantic dinner
for you and me at my....
Your turn.
Ahmm...I don't know!
You're not feeling very bright today, are you?
Mouse...
♪ House....
- Oh! Of course, House...
Ok, ok...
Yeah... ok
So that is the game, you've got it?
Yeah, yeah, sure!
Let's play it again.
Be ready, hein?
- I am.
♪♫ I'll give you for your birthday what I guess you'll love
that is a little mouse.
And I'll prepare a dinner, a romantic dinner
for you and me at my....
- House!
Yeah! Great!
♪♫ If that is what you want, my girl, what you do wish
I'll present you this pet.
♪♫ I'll do whatever needed to get you with me, to get you
into my...
- Bed?
No way!
It's a romantic song!
♪ Friend's house whose name is Fred.
♪♫ We'll watch a magic sunset, holding hands together
on a nice beach next.
And then with my left hand and caresing your neck
I'll try to touch your...
- Breast?
Come on!
Hair which is the best.
♫ I'll even whisper softly, to your ear so softly
"my girl I love you".
I'll do whatever needs to be done, to be able to at last...
- Fuck you.
What the...?
Date you.
Come on! Sing with me!
♫♪♫ (perfectly well tuned accompaniment)♪♫♪♪♫♪♫
This chick is a genius!
Look! The weather forecast!
Good morning United Kingdom.
Ejem...
There's no map!
Show us the map!
What is it?
A..a map.
No! This map!
Show us this map!
Sorry dear audience, but she is still in work practices.
Okay...
This is the real map.
Ok.
Let's start with the outlook for Monday.
In the south the whole day will be warm
with
unbroken sunshine.
What are you doing?
Giving more realism.
It increases the audience.
No! Stop it.
Okay...There may be local showers
though, in Oxford.
What are you doing??!!
Ahmm...realism.
Shh...shhh...
Okay...ok...ok...
Don't worry.
On Tuesday
a cold front
will be affecting some north-west districts,
and fog
will develop in much of Cardiff.
Okay...
In some distritcs it'll be rather dense.
What the fuck are you doing??
You are stupid!
Shhh...shhh...
Calm down, calm down.
A gale at sea...
STOP IT!
A gale at sea is expected by Wednesday
which will cause extremely high waves near the coast.
DO YOU WANT REALISM?
I'LL GIVE YOU SOME REALISM!!