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Marc Muszynski Stand Up -

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- How 'bout that smooth music? Oh no, what have I done? Okay, guys, how are you guys doin'? (cheering) You're woo, awesome. I have to confess, I'm a little less woo. Because my wife found a pair of sexy women's underwear in our laundry, that wasn't hers. - [Woman] Boo. - Yeah, and it wasn't mine either. (laughing) I have no idea how they got there, but I discovered something. There's no amount of trust between two people, that a stranger's panties can't destroy. She brought it up almost like a joke. Like, oh, this is so weird, I found these girl's underwear in the drier. I'm sorry, I, must've thought they were yours. That's funny. They're too skinny to be mine. And too see-through. But I guess you don't notice what I wear. (laughing) We live in a big building, there's a 99.100% chance that some very liberated size zero left her second (mumbles) in the drier, and I, a visually impaired guy, didn't notice. But there is no amount of logic that can erase that teensy sliver of doubt, that maybe I'm the kind of gentlemen monster who launders his mistress's underpants. (laughing) Darling, oh darling we made a real mess in these, let me toss 'em in the laundry bin I share with my wife. At this point, I just needed to say I'm not having an affair. Quickly, 'cause it's already my word against her panties. But the problem is there's way to say, you're not having an affair, that doesn't sound exactly like you're having an affair. Mine came out something like, I'm not having an affair. And somehow, she started to calm down. Until, I felt this train wreck happening in my mouth. Because, if I was I wouldn't be that dumb about it. You can question my loyalty, but not my intelligence. In that moment, I knew exactly why OJ published If I Did It. (laughing) How would you do it then, if you're not that dumb? As I stared back in defiance, one thing because extremely clear I had absolutely no idea how to have an affair. So you are that dumb. Well, that's good to know. I mean, I would be way better than you. If I did it. (laughing) Thank you guys. (applauding)

Video Details

Duration: 3 minutes and 20 seconds
Country:
Language: English
License: Dotsub - Standard License
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Views: 0
Posted by: marcmuszynski on Dec 15, 2017

Marc Muszynski performs a 3-minute stand-up set at Flappers Comedy Club in Burbank about the time his wife found a pair of stranger's panties in their laundry and how hard it is to explain that you're not having an affair.

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