How Harry Potter Should Have Ended
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Welcome everyone to Hogwarts School of Wizardry and Witchcraft.
A place I assure you is safe for children
and has absolutely no history
that might threaten our entire existence.
But, there is a huge killer snake downstairs..
And a giant vicious three-headed dog...
And a tree that can kill you..
And man-sized spiders that can eat your face..
Thank you Professor Dumbledore, that will
be all.
As he was saying, welcome to---
These candles are dripping wax everywhere!
Harry Potter, how it should have ended.
That time turner is fantastic, Hermione! You
should keep it forever!
Alright.
No really, its too valuable. You have to promise
to keep it.
Okay, I promise.
Hermoine, something might conveniently destroy
all the time-turners making that the last one!
You've got to keep it!
I promise I won't get rid of it!
What the bloody hell are you two talking about??
I'm going to kill you, Harry Potter!
I'm pointing my wand as hard as I can!!
What is it gonna take, Tom??
You tried to kill me once as a baby and it
didn't work.
I'm going to destroy you!!
We've beaten you like 4 or 5 times already
and I just came back from the dead.
Lalalala!
I'm not listening, too busy about to kill you!
You are insane and now we are about to kill
your pet snake!
I'm awesome!
It's over!
It's never over!
Avada Kedav- OH!
Ah, muggle weapons.
Professor Snape, you're alive!
Of course I'm alive, you twit.
Professor Snape, you're alive!
Of course I'm alive, you twit.
But how? You died right in front of us..
Magic, duh!
I'm a potions master and a double agent. Obviously
I had a backup plan.
I've been drinking honey badger anti-venom
ever since I started hanging around that ridiculous snake.
Honey badger just takes what it wants.
And to think we've already established that
I can heal bleeding injuries.
Now, Mr. Potter if you will bring me your
invisibility cloak and Miss Granger's time turner
there is one more thing here I must do.
Professor, you realize if you do this, you
can't come back.
I am well aware of the risk and consequence,
Ms. Granger.
You're gonna have to turn that thing at least
200,000 times, sir.
Then you best not make me lose count. Eh,
Mr. Weasley?
No, sir.
Good luck, sir.
Goodbye, children.
1,2,3,4,5,6....
262,000ish turns later.
262,029... 262,030... 262,031...
Got it, got it!
I can make animals do what I want without
training 'em.
I can make bad things happen to people,
if
I want.
-I can make-
Avada Kedavra!!
-What the??
-HA, HA, HA!!
What is this?
Take that you dark lord!
-Hahahah!
-Why would you do that?
Evidence removal!
Who are you??
Oh, sorry about that...
Just uh..
saving your
life.
In the future...
As well as countless others...
It's a long story.
The end.
No, I mean like a really long story.
Like
so long, if we wrote it all down it would take up at least 7 books!
Or 8 movies!
I'd like to introduce our new teacher for
Defense Against the Dark Arts, Professor Gandalf...
YOU SHALL NOT PASS!!!!
Well, that's a little harsh.
Classes haven't even started yet.
Hey there, thanks for watching our short,
we hope you liked it.
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It's really hard to see in these things.
Well take off those silly glasses, then!
I'm never taking off these glasses!
See ya next Thursday!