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Girls With Guts Retreat, 2015

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I got diagnosed at 15 so it changed my world, my parents world because I was severely sick. So it was missing school and it was in the hospital. It changed everybody's life. And as I got older it became the guilt of relationships I had. Like if I would go through a flare and get sick I would be like okay we don't need to be together anymore. Oh no it's not your…you don't need to do this. You're not sick. I'm sick. It's not your responsibility to take care of me. The guilt has been a major thing in my life for so long. That I finally just had to let it go. It's been the best thing that I did. Because like I've said I've lived with it for 20 years and I've pushed so many people away. It's okay to ask for that help. If in three months I'm in the hospital…where's my son going to go? That constant worry about, you know, when's the other shoe going to drop on this? Because right now I'm okay but in two years am I going to be okay? Being the mom, you know, i've overcome so much but I can't keep up with a healthy body. You know, and they don't get it. I have to constantly explain to them… I'm so tired. Well why are you tired? You slept really good. You went to bed early. And you feel guilty saying it. And that's why this group of girls is so important. Because we kinda all get it. But in the normal life…I feel so guilty about it. For me… I brought them to see my doctors with me and he step by step explained this is what's happening to her. And after that they've like offered to help come with me to get my Remicade. And they've really helped with like what can't you eat we'll make sure that nothings in there. So I think that really helped them. I'm really excited to be here and so happy that all of you have made this commitment to come on out and be a part of this amazing weekend. I'm going to read a statement and if it pertains to you we're going to have you step forward. I have had to have surgery. Because of IBD I have had to stop working. I have struggled with depression or anxiety. I have become empowered to advocate for myself. And others (in background) What do I do? Do I go with an ostomy or do I go with a Jpouch? And I give them the pros and cons of both and I tell them this was my experience. I was terrified to go back for the third surgery. Like I was just full blown terrified. It took months of therapy for me to be like okay I can do this. I want to do the takedown. Because at that point I was just frozen. I didn't know what to do. And that's when I came to Girls With Guts last year. And was like what do I do? And I think that really gave me the courage to be like no I'm going to do the takedown. I'm going to complete this. And then you start worrying about what's going to happen in the future. And then she's like you've got two beautiful kids… You now have your ostomy and before I had my ostomy I couldn't go to the football games. I can do that now. I'm going to enjoy everything I possibly can right now. Right now is what matters. I'm Mel by the way. Hi. You guys are doing a really great job. This is hard work. My particular interest especially in more recent years… Is the use of yoga and meditation to support our health. You are the person here who is actually creating the feeling that you wish to hold in yourself. I'm guiding you through an exercise but you are doing the work. Okay so what does your digestive tract look like? Maybe yours looks like the one on the left. Maybe yours looks like this. That is a nice flowing river. So maybe yours looks like a nice flowing river. Or maybe it looks like this. (laughter) But you should feel that belly begin to rise. (counting) Exhale through the mouth. (counting) You know and we get tunnel vision like it's all good or it's all bad. And as soon as we can identify there are so many other aspects to this. Step back for a second and then you can see the grey. I'm very thankful that you all came this weekend. And I hope it was helpful and that it made you guys feel less alone. Or you found that sister that I was really hoping you would find this weekend. And that hopefully you learned a couple things, too. Everybody who comes and does this we all do it on a volunteer basis. Because we believe in it and we think it's really important. By you guys coming it shows us that it is important and makes us want to keep doing it every year. And I maybe selfishly think it's really important. But every year I am amazed at how many people come. It means so much to me and to all of us that you guys come and you give up your time with your families or your jobs. And you spend your money and you trust us with your weekend. To teach you and to take care of you and to support you. And that means the world to all of us that you believe in us that much. So thank you. So this weekend who can be your person. Who will be your whenever you need something person. Who, if they're local, will drop everything for you person. There is absolutely no reason, anymore, why you have to feel like people don't get you. And it sucks that your family can't do it. That sucks. That sucks so bad. But like sometimes they just can't. But the people here will and they will always do it for you. You are tough. You're Girls With Guts. (laughter)

Video Details

Duration: 7 minutes and 46 seconds
Country: Andorra
Language: English
License: Dotsub - Standard License
Genre: None
Views: 14
Posted by: ibdgirls on Dec 15, 2015

Retreat Final_FINAL FOR VIMEO

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