Funny Accents
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See, that’s the problem, though
Here in America, when it comes to the English,
We mistake accent with intellect
Right?
We think they’re all smart because no matter what they’re talking about, they sound quite intelligent.
It doesn’t really matter
He can talk about anything
He’ll be like “my belly button is quite itchy.”
And we’ll be like, “that dude is smart.”
But they’re not all smart, okay. They just sound smart.
They look dumb with the crooked teeth and the wacky hair.
Oh, no, you go to England, and some of these Englishmen have that elephant man look about them
“I know I look a bit frightening, but
at least I sound intelligent.”
And the English
The English have a weird thing with the letter T
Because sometimes, they over pronunciate the letter, like that
And sometimes, they ignore the letter completely
It’s like “What happened?! Where did the letters go?”
And there are two Ts in the word letter and yet they’re nowhere to be found
It’s quite odd, right?
See, I understand if there was like one T and you just missed it
You know, that’s fine, whatever. Whatever, one T gone, fine
But when they’re two Ts and you just skip over them like that
That’s just rude
It’s like the letters don’t even matter
The English and their Ts. They spend half their days drinking Ts and the other half ignoring them
But every accent
Every accent has a weird relationship with one letter
Like the Russian accent
The Russians, they take the letter Y and put it between every other letter
Take any sentence, like, “This traffic is unbelievable.”
They would say, "this traffic is unbelievable
I cannot believe it
I’ve been sitting here for fifteen minutes."
The Israeli accent
It’s the letter, it's letter M
They take Ms, put an M between every other letter, every other word
“Mm, I want-m-to-m- go- m- to-m-get-m…”
What do you want, a bag on M&Ms? What the hell are you talking about?
And then, of course
Then of course, we have the German accent, which
Which is just music to my ears
They’re crazy with the letter Z. They’re crazy with the Z
As a fact, I ran into a German guy this afternoon
He was looking at me funny, you know
He was staring at me, like
“Aren’t you the guy that I saw this morning at the coffee house?”
And I was like, “Eh, how do I get out of this?”
“Uh, em, I’m terribly sorry, but this must be a case of mistaken identity.”
Thank you, guys. That as fun
Thank you