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Coach Connection and Trust

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>> Hi. Do you play any musical instruments? Learning an instrument, like learning a language, requires putting a lot of pieces together. You have to learn the finger positions, and if it's a woodwind or brass, the embouchure. You have to learn how to read music, how to tune your instruments, and how to know whether or not it's out of tune. You also have to learn rhythm, which can be the hardest part. Today, we're focusing on coaching self-connection by helping clients connect with their bio-individual body tunes. Like learning music, connecting with the body tune means listening into the body and intuition, what it's trying to say, and then honoring that. It helps clients let go of the body-brain pull, the continual tug of war between the brain and the rest of the body, and then encourages self-awareness, self-nourishment, and self-empowerment. In this lecture, we'll highlight how you, as an Integrative Nutrition Health Coach, can help clients tap into their personal rhythms of hunger, emotions, and food triggers by listening in, and develop self-trust. Let's start with self-awareness, connecting to the body tune. Can you easily find the beat in a song? Some music has a more straight feel, one and two and three and four. Some music has a more swing feel, one and two and three and four. Some rhythms are more straightforward. And some are harder to find. For example, syncopation sounds like this. Have you ever struggled to find the beat? Some people pick it up more easily than others, and that's quite all right. We all have different skills. As an Integrative Nutrition Health Coach, you can help clients find their personal beats or hunger rhythms. This self-connection is yet one more valuable piece of supporting clients around food relationships. Connecting to personal body tunes means recognizing and honoring physical hunger. Clients who are used to eating based on emotional hunger might be quite disconnected from this. In other words, the rhythm is off somehow. And if they're stuck in a cycle of stress or emotional eating, for example, it can be very hard to get back on the natural beat. Are you with me? Early on, in this course, we included a handout called Finding Your Rhythm, which explores emotional versus physical hunger. But how do you help clients not only connect with physical hunger but also honor it? Here are three questions to help clients do both. Number one, why are they eating? The idea of hunger can have deep roots and can have negative connotations. Maybe clients feel weak for not being able to maintain willpower. Maybe they enjoy the feeling of physical hunger and the success when they win over the body by ignoring it. Or maybe it's the opposite. Maybe feeling physically hungry makes them emotionally uncomfortable because for them, the idea of being filled is intricately linked in body and mind. For example, if they fill themselves up with food, they'll feel emotionally full. Still others might view hunger as something to be eliminated or fixed. In short, many clients might have some kind of insecurity around hunger, and as a result, not honor it. As an Integrative Nutrition Health Coach, you can continually remind clients that physical hunger is normal. We all feel hunger, and it comes and goes. It doesn't reflect anything about us personally. It simply means that we're human. Back to the music metaphor. When you're trying to learn a new rhythm as a musician, you start with a slow tempo. You break it down step by step. And with practice, it becomes second nature. At that point, you can speed it up because you found your flow. You can also help clients slow down and tune into their hunger rhythms. Learning to listen to hunger signals helps distinguish between emotional and physical hunger. Paying attention mindfully sheds light on appetite and whether it's the body that wants food or the mind. However, if clients are disconnected from their bodies and their intuitions, they might not know what physical hunger feels like. Therefore, you can work with them to identify triggers, including emotions that motivate them to eat when hungry or eat when not hungry or not eat when hungry. Finally, you can consistently return to bio-individuality. Everyone experiences both emotional and physical hunger in slightly different ways. I, for one, can get a little cranky when I'm very physically hungry. And it usually happens when I'm running around nonstop. I consider it my body's way of saying, "Hey, slow down and pay attention to me." Number two, when are they eating? Some people simply eat when they're physically hungry. They're in tune with their bodies and all feels pretty simple to them. However, many clients will eat according to other factors. For example, they might eat on a schedule at the same time every day regardless of hunger. As an Integrative Nutrition Health Coach, you can support them through the process of finding what works for them. Some people feel physically better when they include snacks throughout the day. Other people do well with three square meals. Physical hunger rhythms also change. Remember how stress can impact hunger? Illness also impacts appetite, as I'm sure, you've experienced. It can feel erratic, and that's okay. That's normal. You can help clients catch themselves using the word should around eating. In fact, that can be a great place to help them start connecting to hunger. Many clients might try diets or ways of eating that work against natural hunger. You can help them understand that being hungry reassures their metabolism. Number three, how much are they eating? Finding personal hunger rhythms includes portions. It's probably safe to assume that many people overeat, many people under eat, and many people have no clue how much they eat. You can help clients connect with their body tunes, which again are unique. Some people thrive on a large breakfast, while others do just fine having a very small one. Many health experts encourage having a smaller dinner, yet some people have larger evening meals and do great with that. It's one size fits none. Finding a personal hunger rhythm means figuring out what works for your body and your emotions. That said, you can support clients by perhaps suggesting that they don't always have to join the clean plate club and finish every morsel on every plate set before them. If they're eating mindfully, they'll probably get just as much satisfaction with one small piece of cake as they would with two larger pieces and their body will respond accordingly. We'll talk more about mindful eating later in the course. To recap so far, as an Integrative Nutrition Health Coach, you can help clients find their personal beats or hunger rhythms when they lose the beat, so to speak, by exploring why they're eating, when they're eating, and how much they're eating. We included a handout called Connecting to Your Hunger Rhythm in your Learning Center that might help. You'll notice that it's similar to the Finding Your Rhythm exercise earlier in the course. But again, different approaches make sense for different people. Developing more healthful relationships with food requires self-connection. Only by understanding the mind-body connection can self-trust develop. For example, if you're disconnected from physical hunger signals, how can you possibly trust those signals? Telling clients that they simply need to learn to trust themselves doesn't honor the truth that many of them might not be ready for that. Self-trust can be incredibly challenging. In fact, for some clients, it might be the most challenging part of overcoming emotional eating habits. It's a process that requires continually choosing connection over disconnection and, over time, figuring out not only how to listen to the body but how to actively follow its guidance. Here are three places to start helping clients develop greater self-trust. Number one, tune into intuition. In order to start trusting the messages that your body or mind may be trying to tell you, you have to develop your skills at being able to tune in and receive these messages in the first place. This isn't something that's going to happen overnight. But the more you're able to strengthen your mind-body connection, the easier it will become. Remember the brain-body pull? Trusting the body makes it harder to fight against it and try to control it. The body is wise and our gut instinct has merit. But trusting isn't easy either. In a sense, we've learned how to outsmart our eating intuitions. Many clients will struggle to trust themselves. Perhaps they've made bad decisions in the past. Perhaps they believe they can't be trusted on their own because they're looking to you for help. Plus, they want answers. They don't have time to slow down and figure it out for themselves. In addition, many cultures don't teach the importance of self-trust. They emphasize self-control. Would you agree with this? It's nice to have control, right? If clients can just get their eating habits under control, they can move on and find happiness or so they believe. How do you guide clients away from that? Well, you can start by helping them understand that trusting the body and intuition actually gives them more control because it puts them in the driver's seat. It allows them to honor what works for them. If you're a musician playing in a group, you have to honor the group's rhythm. However, if you're playing solo, you might play around with the rhythm and make it your own because you have the freedom to do that. Trusting the gut requires some improvisation or making it up as you go without a prior plan by tuning in and finding your own groove. Research the term improvisation if you're unfamiliar with it. Number two, replace self-judgments with self-nourishment. Sound familiar? We covered this idea earlier in the course. But it's all related. Developing trust requires taking risks, trial and error, and continually practice as you try to connect with yourself. What your body is trying to tell you, the purpose of your emotions, and what habits support your personal values and goals? Do you think that self-judgment helps with this process or not? Probably not. Receptivity and patience, acceptance and compassion, these are the self-nourishing keys to the kingdom. Number three, trust the voice. Let's ride this music metaphor to the end, shall we? We've discussed self-empowerment a lot in this course because, ultimately, your clients are the experts on themselves. They just might not realize it yet. Connecting to the body tune includes not only connecting to personal hunger rhythms but also connecting to the voice. As a musician, you often learn the rhythm first, then add the notes. The underlying rhythm grounds the melody, which is more fragile on its own. Tuning into intuition means connecting with your rhythm. This is step one. Step two is trusting the voice which empowers you. Think of it like this. The hunger rhythms are the background beat, and the voice is the melody. If you've ever played an instrument, you might agree that no two musicians sound exactly alike. For example, five clarinetists create five variations of sound based on the player and the instrument. The sounds are similar but different. They're bio-individual. You know the drill by now, right? What works for one person doesn't always work for another. Okay, one more piece here. As an Integrative Nutrition Health Coach, you can help clients trust their own voices versus trusting rules they create for themselves or rules created by others. This means trusting their personal values and choosing whether or not to live in line with those values. It means trusting that they're enough as they are now and they don't need the approval of others. Imagine you're working with a client who's very disconnected from his or her voice and instead eats in ways that fall in line with both internal and external rules and shoulds. How would you help such a client trust the voice? Take a moment right now to think about that. Grab your journal and write down some ideas. Now look at your notes and ask yourself this. Do I trust my voice? Developing self-trust is a process and it's an important component of emotional eating. You can support clients through this journey by helping them replace judgment with nourishment, tune into their physical and intuitive guts, and trust their bio-individual voices. We all have different voices and different rhythms. Some of us eat based on a more straight beat, breakfast, lunch, dinner. While others are a little more swing, breakfast, lunch, and dinner. As always, remember scope of practice. It's not your job to judge, for example, to share your personal feelings about hunger. And remember, if you suspect a client needs help beyond what you offer as a coach, don't hesitate to make a referral. But it is your job to ask high-mileage questions that help clients discover alternate ways of thinking about hunger. They are the number one experts. That's all for today. Make sure to create space for practicing the material with your accountability coaching partner this week. Also, continue to think about what you can send out to your course mates in the Facebook group and with people you know in your community. Remember, this part of the course is kind of like an internship where you can practice and apply what you've learned. So use it as an opportunity to get out there and do the work that motivated you to take this course.

Video Details

Duration: 15 minutes and 23 seconds
Country: United States
Language: English
License: Dotsub - Standard License
Genre: None
Views: 5
Posted by: integrativenutrition on Mar 14, 2019

Coach Connection and Trust

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