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Grammar Nazis

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Good Morning, Monsieur Lapadite. I'm colonel Hans Landa of the SS. I was hoping you can invite me inside your home and we can have a discussion. Of course. Please, come in. Now, as you may have heard I'm in charge of rounding up all the jews in this village. Yes, I have heard that. Are you aware of any jews hiding in the area? No. No, I assure you that there haven't no jews in this village. There haven't been no jews... So there have been some jews. Oh, ah..sorry. No, I meant, there haven't been any jews... no jews here. Sorry, I was confused by a double negative. You see grammar is very important to the nazi party. Now, are you familiar with one, Shosanna Dreyfus? Yes, I know her. Me and her buy our milk in the same market. Me and her? Surely you meant to say "she and I", no? Yes, of course. The trick is to take the other person out of sentence to see if it makes sense. Me buy milk? I think not. I buy milk. You see? I swear I don't know where miss Dreyfus is at. Did you just ended a sentece with a preposition? Forgive me, colonel. When was the last time you saw the jew Dreyfus About a month ago I was walking by the river Bayonne and I saw Dreyfus fishing so I went down to the river bank to see if it was her but I couldn't get a good view. Aw, did you really think I was so stupid that I wouldn't recognise a run-on sentence? Sorry, there was no jews here. Jew or jews, plural? Plural Wrong, you have to match the subject with your verb. What do you want from me? I've heard from numerous sources, you are hiding madamoiselle Dreyfus. From who? From whom? Don't kill me, please. Monsieur Lapadite, I have one more question for you. If you answer correctly, I will leave you and your family in peace. If not, you are coming with me. Now, let's say you are writing a list. Would you or would you not put a coma before the end? It depends on whether you are following the Chicago Manual of Style or the Associated Press Guide. Hiding under the floorboards, I have finally found you. Wait. You are hiding under the floorboards or she? A dangling participle.

Video Details

Duration: 3 minutes and 26 seconds
Country: United States
Language: English
Producer: CollegeHumor
Views: 374
Posted by: zegeri on Apr 11, 2011

Not official video.

Done by: http://www.collegehumor.com

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