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CIP Co Creating the Coaching Relationship

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Hi, welcome back. Now that you have the big picture of what coaching is and how to structure your program, we'll start to zoom in and take a look at the actual processes, skills, and knowledge that a coach counts on during the stages we've discussed. A key component of success in coaching is the relationship between coach and client itself. So let's start there. In this lecture, we'll take a look at how the coach and client co-create the coaching relationship. Note how I said that this is a co-creation, meaning that it's something you build collaboratively. We'll explore the conditions and qualities that make for a strong coaching relationship and we'll also take a close look at the two-key ingredients for a successful relationship. Okay, so before you can go deep with a client's emotions, you need to set a solid foundation. This foundation is the coaching relationship. Each partnership will be unique in its own way. But in every good coaching relationship, the coach facilities behavior change by empowering the clients you uncover his or her resources, values, and strategies. The coach provides the structure to do the work, but the client leads the way in crafting a meaningful and individualized plan of action that's based on his or her preferences and experiences. If there's one thing to remember from this lesson, it's that as a Health Coach, you're doing whole person coaching. This means you'll keep your focus on this unique individual in all their fullness, dimensions, richness, and complexity. Everyone has strengths and weaknesses. The goal is to help each client uncover their particular set of strengths and figure out how to leverage them in a purposeful way. Clients will do some things really well and they'll have limitations in other areas. They don't need fixing. Your clients are already whole and resourceful. The best solutions for improving their lives already exist within them. Coaching is a client-centered relationship. This is a non-authoritative approach that lets the client lead. There are six key competencies around building a client-centered relationship that are outlined by the NBHWC. Let's take a look at each. One, the client's agenda, interests, preferences, and needs drive the entire relationship. This means putting your own goals and plans that you may have for the client aside. Now this can be easier said than done when you feel like you really know what's best for a client, but they may want to proceed in a different direction. Now there is room for education. But the coach must always honor and validate what the client wants to do. Two, limit sharing of personal information and experiences. Sharing on the part of the coach can be a helpful tool when applied appropriately, sparingly, and strategically. As humans, and especially as coaches, we're wired to want to connect. However, it's important to keep the focus on the client and only share when the information is what's needed to help him or her move forward. Three, on a similar note, coaches should educate and provide recommendations only when specifically asked or given permission to do so. Now asking permission to share information can feel a little different at first, but it's actually really important to do in the coaching relationship. This keeps the client in the driver's seat and helps make the information sharing a more collaborative and active experience. It also primes the client to receive information. If you've never done this before, we encourage you to give it a try in your next session. Asking permission speaks volumes to the client about your deep level of respect for their autonomy and self-direction. Four, observe, identify, and refer to the client's non-limiting beliefs and values throughout the process. By eliciting the client's beliefs and values, the coach helps them to construct a meaningful wellness vision that's driven by the client's inner motivation. Five, empower the client by reinforcing that he or she is resourceful, whole, and not in need of being fixed. Remember, the primary role of the coach is not to be a content expert, educator, or advisor. And six, adjust your approach in order to meet the client where he or she is at in terms of health literacy. What this means is that if you have a client who's eaten the standard American diet for their whole life and is hooked on eating processed foods and sweets every day, daily green juices and raw detox salads may not be a realistic recommendation for that client. Meeting that individual where they're at might look more like, helping them cut down from five sodas a day to two sodas a day, and swapping out their morning donut for scrambled eggs. So beyond these general guidelines on how to interact with clients, what else goes into creating the coaching relationship? Well, there are two key ingredients of a strong client-centered relationship, trust and rapport. The key factors that help establish trust and rapport include showing empathy, paying attention, holding on to the client's desires and goals, and reminding the client of them as needed, practicing non-judgment, asking the client for feedback, following through on commitments and promises, actively listening through mirroring, reframing, and affirming, asking for permission, especially when coaching around sensitive or new areas, and being fully engaged and 100% present with the client. Do you have a favorite method in this list? Which of these are you already good at and which could you use more practice with? Trust and rapport create your coaching environment. Keep in mind that it's the coach's responsibility to create a safe and supportive environment that produces ongoing mutual respect and trust. The coaching environment is a positive space where the client feels unconditionally accepted and supported. Why is this so important? Well, in short, clients are better able to clarify their values and tap into their inner motivation when they feel like they're in a place where they can be vulnerable and honest without fearing judgment. So then, the question remains. How do you build the trust and rapport needed to create a safe environment? First, act in the best interest of your clients at all times. Again, this involves putting your own agenda and needs aside. Demonstrate genuine concern for your client's welfare and future. Be sincere, authentic, and honest. Creating rapport doesn't mean overdoing it on your warmth and enthusiasm in a way that's unnatural. In short, don't be fake. Clients will pick up on it and this will erode the relationship and make it harder for them to open up and be honest and vulnerable in return. Convey what's known as unconditional positive regard. This term was coined by Carl Rogers who pioneered the field of client-centered therapy. But the concept has been adopted into coaching as a key component in a positive working relationship. Unconditional positive regard refers to an attitude of complete acceptance towards your client, regardless of what they say or do because you see them as another human being who's striving to be their best. Underlying this is a belief that all persons have dignity and are valuable. They all have a right to be heard and respected. Coaching is a great opportunity for clients to experience unconditional positive regard, sometimes for the first time in their lives. Next, calmly and caringly address any conflict or discord that arises with a client as it occurs. Sometimes things don't always go smoothly with clients, and this is just part of the process. But when conflict arises or your client seems upset or dissatisfied, you'll want to address this in the moment and process what's going on. Now I know this can feel intimidating or awkward for coaches who don't like confrontation, but it's very important not to sweep things under the rug, so to speak. When this happens, approach the client with warmth and curiosity. You can say something like, "I'm noticing from your reaction that you seem unhappy with me." "Did I say something that upset you?" "I'm open to feedback, if you're comfortable discussing what you're feeling right now." And finally, stay true to your agreements and promises. Establish commitments clearly and stick to them. If you don't think you can follow through on a commitment to a client, you're better off not making it. To create a safe and supportive coaching relationship, it's also necessary to demonstrate sincere respect for your client's perceptions, learning styles, and personal being. This is how you convey that he or she is the expert. You should be attentive to the ways they communicate in their own learning style. Supporting clients includes acknowledging and reinforcing new and positive behaviors and actions. This includes validating and honoring behaviors that involve vulnerability, risk-taking, and fear of failure. The safe space that you co-create will help your client explore this new and scary territory. By demonstrating your confidence in their ability to learn, grow, and change, you in turn support the development of your client's self-efficacy. Self-efficacy, as you'll learn later on in this course, is the belief in one's ability to create change and achieve goals. As you can imagine, this is critical to the coaching process. As you build rapport and establish trust, your client will begin to sense that this coaching relationship is different from any other relationship they have. And the more you tune into and learn about your client, you'll be able to pick up on their nonverbal cues, emotions, and energy. As a result, you can attend to not only their words, but to their emotions and behaviors. You'll be able to pick up on subtle cues that may otherwise go unseen. When this happens, you can demonstrate a curious interest which will allow the opportunity to go deeper while building trust. For example, imagine you're working with a client who's sharing positively about her past week, but her body language and tone seem to indicate a discrepancy. You could say something like, "I notice that you seem really detached and distant when telling me about your week. And I also can't help but notice that you're a bit dissatisfied that you didn't accomplish what you set out to do from our last session. I wanna invite you to share what's really on your mind now." Now that may seem a bit provocative, if you're not used to engaging in direct communication yet, but it is expected of a Professional Coach. However, keep in mind that you must first develop trust and rapport with your client before you venture into these kinds of communications and exchanges. If you take direction from your intuition and it doesn't pan out, don't worry. Simply acknowledge that you're happy to be corrected. Let the client tell you what's really going on, what obstacles have come up, and what's gotten in the way, then support them and shifting to a new perspective, implementing a new behavior, or establishing a simpler action or homework for the next week. Remember, you are co-creating this relationship, you're not dictating how it should go. Co-creation is a shared endeavor based on mutual trust and respect. Okay, we've covered a lot, so let's do a quick recap. The coaching relationship is the foundation of your work with clients. A strong coaching relationship creates a safe environment for your client to go deep into their emotions, open up, and take risks. The key components of this relationship are trust and rapport, which is why it's so critical to spend time establishing these qualities, especially in the beginning stages of coaching. It's the responsibility of the coach to try to create a warm environment, but the coaching relationship is co-created collaboratively with the client. And this involves taking a client-centered approach and coaching holistically. The coaching relationship is special and different from other relationships in your client's life. It may be the one place where they feel they can truly be honest and vulnerable and feel safe to share without judgment. It may be the first time they've been met with unconditional positive regard. So your honesty, sincerity, authenticity, and belief in your client's ability to succeed is what will lay the groundwork for meaningful change to occur. What are your favorite ways to establish rapport and build trust with clients? What comes easily to you and what areas do you need more practice? We'll be discussing these questions in your course Facebook group this week, so be sure to stop by and share your thoughts. Thanks for tuning in. See you next time.

Video Details

Duration: 13 minutes and 48 seconds
Country: United States
Language: English
License: Dotsub - Standard License
Genre: None
Views: 6
Posted by: ninaz on Sep 4, 2019

CIP Co Creating the Coaching Relationship

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