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Happiness: A Conscious Choice - Vishnu Menon

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I am sure you will all agree with me when I say that seeing a baby sleep is one of the most peaceful sights in this world. They are so pure and egoless and that’s what makes them so lovable. Babies are examples of our natural ability to not give up when faced with failure. Have you ever noticed babies when they try to walk? What happens? What happens when a baby tries to walk? It falls and then cries; again the baby tries to walk, falls and cries again till it walks by itself one day! They never give up. Little children are examples of our natural ability to dream. They are not afraid to dream. In fact, they proudly go around advertising their dreams, “I want to do this!”, “I want to become that!” But as we grow older, we lose those natural qualities because of circumstances, environment and failures. And somewhere along the way; we start to embrace fear, worry, anger and ego. People then feel it is ‘natural’ to cling on to those imbibed feelings when things go wrong. Remind ourselves that positive qualities are always inside us no matter who you are and where you are in life! You can choose and rely on those qualities anytime and anywhere to build your happiness! If a person walks up to me and says that my suit looks horrible then “I respect your opinion but this dress is my choice, I like it.” No matter how hard that person tries, they will not mess with my happiness. Let not people play with your emotions! You are too precious for that because you were born with precious qualities! It may sound ok to get upset when someone upsets you. It may sound ok to get angry when someone angers you. But it doesn’t sound ok to give away your right of controlling your mind to someone else! We always want to control the other person’s behavior but we cannot keep controlling people. The only thing that we can control and have complete control is on our responses to them. And here is something interesting: No matter what your responses are in life, you will be the first to experience that response. Let’s say you got angry at someone. You are boiling mad at someone. Who will be the first to experience that anger? Will it be you or the person you’re getting angry at? You! Why? Because when we get angry, All that rage, that anger, hatred is building inside us. And we then throw it to the other person. That person may or may not feel your anger. Research has shown that 3 minutes of anger is enough to drain our energy quicker than 8 hours of work! That’s how damaging anger is! Buddha once beautifully said that holding on to anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die! We are the first to suffer! Can we really afford anger? This man was so frustrated with his coworkers at work. He was also facing problems in his marriage and with his in-laws as well. The man’s frustration in life started to get so evident that it started to show in his job. His manager at work could sense the heat. So the manager took the discouraged man into the glass elevator of the office building. They entered the elevator and the elevator headed to the 5th floor. The manager looked out of the window of the elevator and asked the man, “What can you see outside?” The man replied, “I can see people walking and cars moving.” The elevator went up to the 7th floor. The manager again asked, “What can you see?” The man slightly losing his patience replied, “Well it’s almost the same! Except now I get to see some buildings and some trees. So? Big deal!” Now the elevator went up to the 30th floor. The manager looked into the man’s eyes and asked, “Now, is your view still the same?” The man was mesmerized by the view. The man said, “No…the view is much wider now.” “I can see the sky, the clouds, the sea and the entire city’s skyline!It is beautifu!” The wise leader then asked, “Can you see people now?” The man looking down at the view replied, “Yes but they look like tiny ants moving around in perfect harmony creating no harm to one another.” “How beautiful is that!” The manager then smiled and said, “In order to understand an image, always view the image from a broader perspective rather than focusing on its smaller pixels.” If my focus is always on a person’s habit of talking loudly, then I will never get a chance to see her as a responsible worker that she is. Likewise, if my focus is always on a person’s shabby appearance, then I will never to get to understand the genius that he is. If my focus is always on a person’s bad manners, then I will never to get appreciate the confidence that person is showing. Happiness is not found in relationships. Happiness is found in how you choose to view relationships. Let’s all make a conscious effort to choose happiness so that we get to enjoy the present, so that we completely get to live in the now!

Video Details

Duration: 6 minutes and 28 seconds
Language: English
License: Dotsub - Standard License
Genre: None
Views: 5
Posted by: speaker81 on Nov 15, 2016

My talk at Christ University, Bangalore for the MBA Students on how to gain a better understanding of ourselves and relationships. A must watch!

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