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Crazy Animals

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-What's happenin' forum? Hey, I got an idea. Why don't we make a zipline? Oh, but not just any zipline, a zipline that goes straight to the ground. Like these guys. -Oh, my god! -Now, I can't find the original video of that. i only found copies, so I have no idea how many views it's got. But the accident wasn't that guy's fault. Look, the earth clearly got in his way. And check out the way he just bounces off the ground. "Whee! Balls!" I think the best part is the friend on the sideline who's like, "What's happened?" You see, what happened, dude, is a law of the Internet. If you videotape yourself doing something risky, you're bound to f--k it up and end up on =3. So, there's this DJ but, see, this DJ is different. And he's different mainly because he drinks from the toilet and he might bang your shin if you get a little too close to the turntable. (record scratching) He is so amazing. I like to call him MixMaster Milkbone. And look, MixMaster Milkbone got 100,000 views in about three weeks, mainly because he is just scratching those records like they're flees. You see MixMaster Milkbone cutting it at the club, and you're like, "Yo, that's my dog! No, seriously, that's my dog. He ran away about four months ago." And see, I already know what you're thinking. You're thinking... "Ray, that video's totally fake. DJ's usually have laptops and he totally doesn't have a laptop. He ain't a DJ without a laptop." All right, I admit the video's fake. I mean, you can tell by the dog's face. He is barely amused. And what is he trying to tell us with that face? And I'm telling you right now, guys. MixMaster Milkbone could be the next Keyboard Cat. I'm just throwing that out there. So, you guys sent me this last video like, "Ray, look at this bison. He's a total badass. And I'm, like, "Yeah, of course Bison is a badass. Just look at him." But no, it turns out these people saw a bison in Yellowstone Park. Oh no, I guess they're gonna go f--k with him. -Running from the buffalo. They always run for the bull. Messing with a 2,000-pound wild animal. I mean, this could only end in a positive note. -Look at the shot of Donald getting gored by the buffalo. All right, all right. I think we're good. He doesn't see them. As long as they don't throw anything-- -(slo-mo voice): Ohhh.....s--t! -Back, back, back! -So, yeah, this is the part where the woman gets attacked. And yeah, I'm not trying to act all high and mighty 'cause I get drunk and do some dumb s--t too, but... yeah, that was some dumb s--t. Now, if you watch the full video, the woman says she wasn't seriously injured from the attack, but you don't really get to see the attack. You just kinda get to see like a shaky camera kind of thing. You're disappointed, I know. "Yeah, I wanted to see blood and guts and s--t." All right, calm down. Now, while she wasn't actually injured, you didn't get to see blood and guts or anything, thank goodness, the video was interesting enough to get about 200,000 in around three days. And while she wasn't injured, she was definitely mauled. She got a little surprise butt sex from Mother Nature, that's all I'm saying. And it's all right, it's okay that she got mauled. I was mauled by a huge hairy buffalo in one point of my life. Oh wait, the was your mother. So I guess the point of the review is this: don't mess with Mother Nature, 'cause Mother Nature will definitely cut a ho. And now I feel it only appropriate to say: play 'em off MixMaster Milkbone. (record scratching) But you know what never needs to get played off? The comment question of the day, which comes from a user named, pop! and she said... -My comment question of the day is: what's your money-maker? 'Cause I know what mine is. -So, what's your money-maker? Leave your interesting or creative responses in the comments section be-bebbebebeb-lowlowlow-low-low-low, below. But thanks for watching today's episode of =3. I'm Ray William Johnson and I approve this message. So, tell me forum, what's the worst thing you've ever done? (Stalkin' Your Mom by Wax playing) Captioned by SpongeSebastian

Video Details

Duration: 4 minutes and 40 seconds
Country: United States
Language: English
Producer: Ray William Johnson
Director: Ray William Johnson
Views: 191
Posted by: spongesebastian on Aug 6, 2010

"Equals Three" with RayWilliamJohnson.

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