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Halloween burka

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We're coming up to Halloween again, the time of year when we like to put aside our troubles for a few hours and celebrate all things dark and evil. If you like to dress up in ghoulish outfits on Halloween, and if you're looking to wear something a little different this year, and something truly evil, then forget about the zombie masks and the vampire teeth; go the whole hog and get yourself a burka. The Islamic cloak of death has to be the ultimate Halloween garment, if only because it's so versatile. You could fit it with a pair of bat wings - that would look rather good. Or you could simply carry a scythe, to represent death, of course. I think both ideas would work very well. Or, if you prefer something a bit more authentic, you could carry around a baby with rickets, or a sign saying "Freedom go to hell" or "USA you will pay". The burka is a remarkable garment in that it covers the face while allowing all the ugliness through. So, despite the anonymity it gives, you might just as well be sporting a big old gap-toothed pumpkin-headed grin with a light of demonic insanity burning from within. But, you know me, I always like to look for the good in everybody and everything, and one good thing about wearing a burka is that it will significantly reduce your chances of being raped on the night, and who can say that's a bad thing? It just goes to show there's good to be found in everything if you look for it, even in something as disgusting, degrading and dehumanising as the Islamic shroud of cowardly male misogyny and oppression. And by the way, I hope I didn't offend any western feminists with that remark. I know how touchy some of you girls can get when anyone criticises Islamic male supremacism. Of course, if you want to be really super safe, because we all know what men are like, you'd be even less likely to get raped if you went around inside a wooden box. You could put it on rollers so that your feet don't have to stick out in a provocative and licentious way. Although, on reflection, that might be taking things just a bit too far. Chances are you'll be perfectly OK with the mobile tent, but you might want to have a carpenter standing by just in case. Obviously nobody wants to cause religious offence, so, if you decide to wear a burka on Halloween, you might want to distinguish your Halloween burka from a regular Islamic burka by decorating it with primitive supernatural symbols like, oh I don't know, crescent moons perhaps, something like that? Or you may decide that a skull and crossbones motif is more appropriate. It really is a blank canvas. I certainly hope the idea takes off, because I think western society would be culturally enriched (for a change) if everybody went around in a burka on Halloween. I think it would certainly help to lighten the rather creepy and sinister of this alien garment if we took the annual opportunity that Halloween affords to openly mock and ridicule it as the clownish symbol of male stupidity and inadequacy it really is. And that would inevitably lead to greater mutual understanding, which is something I think we all want. And who knows, it might even persuade extremist Muslims to laugh at themselves - well, there's a first time for everything. And why not? After all, everybody else is laughing at them. Surely it would be divisive and drive a wedge between communities if they were to exclude themselves from all the fun just because they've got no sense of humour. Peace, if that wouldn't be too much trouble.

Video Details

Duration: 3 minutes and 29 seconds
Country: United Kingdom
Language: English
Views: 6,518
Posted by: patcondell on Nov 11, 2011

The ultimate Halloween garment.

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