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Is It Really Lonely at the Top?

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Is it really lonely at the top? When someone says, 'Is it lonely at the top?' Here is the best answer you can give them. It is as lonely as you want it to be. If you want it to be lonely at the top, I guarantee it you can make it lonely at the top. Then you can complain how lonely it is at the top. If you want to make it relational at the top and have many people in your life so it is not lonely at the top you can create that for yourself as well. I have chosen that. I want to have many really high-caliber inner circle friendships. People who can speak into my life and I can speak into their life so that I do not get isolated at the top. You have to be very intentional about it. You have to differentiate who I am speaking to as a church member and who I am speaking to as a friend. When you start out as a pastor you do not really know what you are doing. Some of you started your church because you wanted to create a community. You wanted to draw lonely people together. You wanted to form a Biblically functioning community, where in Acts 2 says, they met in each other's homes with gladness and sincerity of heart. You wanted to create a community. You learn that a church is more than a community. The church is mandated by Jesus to carry out various causes in the world. We have to feed the starving, clothe the naked, set the captives free, all of this compassion and justice. So you think, I cannot just form a community I have to mobilize the community to achieve these redemptive and restoration causes in this world. It takes a different kind of leadership and hat. Then you realize, 'I am also the head of a corporation. I have payroll, light bills, buildings to build. I did not sign up for that.' But you have to lead that. What sometimes helps when we are talking about pastoral isolation... I have some people who I am their boss. They report to me. But when I am with them socially or they are in my small group I say to them, 'I have my community hat on tonight. I am not relating to you as your boss tonight. I am relating to you as a brother in Christ. If you will relate to me with my community hat on, we will be good. We will be able to share about our lives and that will be good.' The next day if they over spend their budget, you call them in and say, 'I do not have my community hat on right now. I have my corporate hat on. You cannot keep over spending your budget or I will fire you.' Then we will go to small group and we will grieve the fact you were fired. You have to be clear what hat you are wearing. Pastors have more than one hat. If you have not thought about it in those terms, I urge you to write that down and start thinking in your relational world are my friends all cause-oriented friends? Are my friends only the people I employ? Many people those are the only people they can hang out with is if they employ them because they have to hang out with you. Or you say, 'can I put those hats down and just be a woman of God a man of God who seeks community with somebody? I use this verbage all the time with my staff. A woman came into my office a few weeks back. She has many health issues. She is a really good staff member. She said, 'can we take our corporate hats off. Can I just be a sister in Christ now and talk about some things?' I put on my community hat and sat down. It is a very helpful tool to know what hat you are wearing. When you have to put the corporate hat on, that helps also to say that you have to talk about an employee's job description, or this or that. And state, 'do not play the community card on me right now because we are in an employment situation as we have this conversation.' That has really helped us.

Video Details

Duration: 5 minutes and 18 seconds
Country: United States
Language: English
Genre: None
Producer: Willow Creek Association
Director: Willow Creek Association
Views: 62
Posted by: landsm on Jul 30, 2013 - #11

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