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Marriage 101 - for Christians part 3 of 4

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unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband. There are some things you are obliged to give to your partner. You should know that marriage is not all about taking. It should be a give and take relationship. Physically, spiritually, economically, all the "-- llys" Scientifically. There's a give and take relationship between a husband and wife from which their marriage will benefit. I will tell you these one by one. As a man, you should give your wife what is due her. What are the things she should be given? Isn't just right to give her your stipend? Am I right or wrong? It's unbelievable. He married someone but he gives his stipend to his mother. Why did you marry anyway? Of course, it will be inappropriate for you to marry your mother. Won't it? The rightful recipient of what you earned is your wife. You just take a portion of it for yourself. Then you give the rest to her. She then spends it for your household needs. Because the law states "Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence:" What you should give your future wife if you plan to get married? Let's hear from Matthew 19:3. This is what we would read. The Pharisees also came unto him, tempting him, and saying unto him, Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife for every cause? And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that He which made them at the beginning made them male and female, And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? There it goes. What is the law when getting married? "this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh." Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. Did you see that? What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. How will you live together? A man leaves his father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? That's what it is. What does one flesh mean? No more twain but one. As it is called in English idioms, "better half". Your spouse is your better half. You're now one flesh. You will leave your mother and father. That's what the law states. Now, when you leave your parents, naturally, you won't be staying with them anymore but you will start living with your spouse instead. Now what? First, there must be a dwelling place. That's where the two of you will stay together. Look at the birds. Even as early as their courtship period, and there are birds that haven't courted anyone, but are already creating nests. That will be their "love nest." There are birds who prepare nest prior to courtship. What do we call it in Tagalog? Pugad. There are other birds that when it's time for their mate to lay eggs, they start looking for hay. Just like my pet dove in the past. It kept looking until it finishes the nest because there they will dwell. That's where its mate will lay eggs. Therefore, if you're planning to get married, find a house first. If you don't have enough money to buy a house, find something to rent. But what other young men say instead, "Just come with me." "Where are we going to live?" "It doesn't matter." Then he lets his wife and himself live with his parents. The two of them will depend on his parents. Sadly, the in-laws often don't go too well. Don't you remember Pepe Pimentel? He said his mortal enemy was his mother-in-law. Why? Sometimes, parents-in-laws become too invasive. "Believe me, son. Your wife is useless." "All she does is sleep all day." "What kind of a woman is that?" The parent-in-law doesn't realize the reason behind that sleepiness is because the daughter-in-law is conceiving. That's really how it is when a woman conceives. You must understand that your daughter-in-law is conceiving and it's her third month. Is it not? But sadly, some parent's-in-laws don't take that into consideration. The tend to look at it in a bad way. That's how differences develop. To prevent such problems or to minimize them, Christ said "Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence:" Therefore, you should give her a house. Do you have one? If your answer is yes, then, you may start courting someone. Now, do you have a house? The problem is, you might have a house but you have no frying pan. It's also not enough to cook fried rice with just a frying pan but no spatula. You can't just use your bare hands to... There is a need for spatula to do that. You will also need a laddle. If you're cooking a soupy dish, a spatula will not do. When it's your time to taste the soup, a spatula can't contain it. More so if it's a slotted spatula. Can it? Now, do you have a laddle, a frying pan, and a cauldron? Do you have a kettle for boiling water? Or at least, a water heater if you don't have a kettle. Is it now complete? Do you have spoons? How about forks? Do you have a melon grater? All those are necessary. Aren't they? Now, do you have a match? Do you have an LPG tank or any means to cook? Do you have pillows? Blankets? That's in preparation for cold seasons. So that you two won't have to fight over a blanket, right? At least there should be two. Do you have those? If you can say yes to all those, my next question is do you have the doctrines? These are the doctrines that you and your wife will live by. It's a must for you to be aware of those doctrines because you're having your own family. And the two of you will be the foundation. If the foundation is weak, the household will likewise be the same. Remember that, brethren. If you start out with strong foundation, the outcome will be also stable. What do I mean? "Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence:" Give her a house. Remember when you were still pursuing her, you would promise her anything "I'll make you the queen in my house." It sounds good. There's nothing wrong with treating your wife as a queen. "I will not let you wash clothes." "I will not let you cook." "I will not let you clean the house." Great. That's sweet sounding to your wife. But the truth is there really is not a house to clean in the first place. The same thing as she won't have to cook because there's nothing to cook at all. The husband turns out to be a lazy man. See? What a poor woman. After begetting three children, she goes back home to her parents. "I told you before, didn't I?" "That man was really no good." That's what his parents-in-law say. What do I mean? Sometimes, broken homes are caused by both parties' ignorance about their obligations. God says "Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence:" What else are supposed to be part of this? House, clothing, food, honor... Do you have something to give? Then, you ought to give it. The problem is you might offer something to your wife... [Singing] Love without honor is what I can only give you. Then you might respond. [Singing] Why would I be ashamed? No. You should say, if there's no honor in what you'll offer me, forget it. Why? Come to think of it, we have a family without honor to start with? We keep hiding because I'm just your number 4? Then the woman will sing Because the man says love without honor is all he can give. [Sings] Forbidden love always in the hiding What a miserable condition because you don't know where to live comfortably because the legal wife keeps finding you. It's too bad. If you plan to get married, be sure to offer a decent marriage to your future wife.

Video Details

Duration: 9 minutes and 22 seconds
Country: Philippines
Language: English
Producer: MCGI
Director: MCGI
Views: 85
Posted by: clowdine on Dec 4, 2010

Brother Eli Soriano teaches doctrines of Christ for married people.

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