HAPHEAD - EPISODE 3 'Grudge Match'
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Alright, let's get this party started! Ladies and gentlemen welcome to... Friday Night Hapfight! These two fine specimens have... ...2 minutes before drone security response. In this corner, representing the T-Dot. We have Maxine the Minx... In this corner, representing our very own Hamilton... ...Hal the Hammer! Oh, Maxine... Shit, that guy is huge! May the best haphead win! Let's hear it! Who wants to see her die? Who wants to see it? Let's hear it! Who wants to see her get beat up? Oh, shit! Here comes the drone. This is Aster*sk security. Please disperse. These activities are in violation of work safety protocols. Hey, Maxi, sorry, I'm late. -It's OK. You should probably nuke it. So, was your replacement late or...? No. I just had to fill like, three incident reports after my shift. A bunch of kids were running races in the mall leaping over shit, knocking things over... Freerunners? I don't know. Kev said something about them being hapheads, because their haircuts, but I didn't follow. Ah, did you want some parmesan? What the?! What happened? Oh, this? You should see the other guy! No, seriously! What happened? Nothing. It was stupid... there was this thing on the line and it kinda swung and grazed me. Goddammit! If it was an inch higher it would have taken out your eye. God this is exactly the kinda shit that happens at these places. -Okay. can you relax, please? Jeez! I was offered the supe position again today. I'm gonna take it. I want you to quit that job... Hah! Oh, no, dad! Yes, Dad. I want you to quit that job and have a summer being a kid. I'm not a fucking kid. What the hell! You're gonna go be a suit and tie monkey for a bit more money. I'm done talking about this! -Great! So am I! Okay, let's do this. Hey, Maxine? I'm going out for a bit. I'll see ya in the morning. Okay, kid? Whatever! Nice tie, there... buddy. Morning. You lasered your tattoo? Is that where you crept off to last night? You look stupid like this. You look like grandpa! I'll see you tonight. Yeah, I'll see you after work... because I'm still going to work!
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