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BAD KIDS!

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-What's happenin', forum? Guys, you know when we watch those videos that show you things you shouldn't be doing? Well, this is one of them. In fact, don't ever ever ever get an airbag, place in an old tire, and have your friend sit on it. [laughter] It's funny 'cause the squirrel gets dead. No, this video got like 100,000 views, it was featured on Attack of the Show, and it's Russians. Of course it's Russian. Russians make the best YouTube videos, don't they? I guess they just run around doing crazy s--t and filming it. In Soviet Russia, people do f--ked up things. I guess the best part is where the guy claps his hands like, -Come on. Let's move this along, comrades. [slow-motion noises] -It's kind of messed up that his buddies can't stop laughing, isn't it? So there's this dog video. It was featured on Ellen, it was featured on CNN, and it got like 1.7 million views in a month. The thing is, this dog is just sitting there, watching Family Guy. -(TV) Wacka wacka. -Brian, have you decided who's gonna star in your show? -Well, it's a tough role. I mean, Byron is a 25-year-old single father going back to finish college so he can do right by his four-year-old daughter. -(British accent): Whatever goes upon two legs is an enemy. No, but the dog kinda looks like he needs a beer, doesn't he? Wait, is this dog one of those same dogs that's on that painting in my uncle's trailer? And I really like the way he looks at the camera towards the end like... -What the f--k are you looking at? Cats or GTFO! -No, but I really like that video. Here's an interesting, yet unrelated side-note. The person who sent me that video, their username is Ass Violator. And I'm not kidding. Ass Violator. 'Cause you know, I guess he violates asses. Never mind. You know, I really enjoy reviewing videos. But every now and then, you guys send me one that makes me want to weep for humanity. So, check this out. There's this 7-year-old girl here. And yes, I blacked out her face, 'cause she's you know, seven. Now this girl is being instructed by whomever is watching her to talk trash via Xbox Live. -Where do you put this? You know what, n----r boy? We just won, hahahaha! [indistinct] You know what? You're gonna f--king lose the game! You're gonna lose the game! Go play Monopoly, okay? You don't f--king know me like that! -You don't know my mom. -You don't know my f--king mom, my dad, my whole entire motherf--king gang. -Yeah, again, sorry I had to black out Lil' Jay's face, but you'll see her face in a few years when she's on Maury. Now, I don't know a ton about this video. I can't find the original. I assume that the parents or whoever got so much s--t about it that they took it down. And you know, I'm not a parent 'cause that would require me getting laid. And I don't like telling people what to do with their kids, but this is just wrong. -You can't do-- you can't do motherf--kin' nothing! You're on the other side of the f--king country! For real, motherf--ker! Who's winning now? Who's winning now? Who's winning? Who's winning? Me. You're gonna be motherf--kin' dead tonight. I don't know who you're talking to, for real, 'cause I'm gonna f--king tell you off. I'm looking at my TV now. I'm not f--king dead now. Who is? [indistinct talking and swearing] -Man, even Jessi Slaughter's dad would look at that and go, "Man, that's f--ked up. You done goof'd." All right, here's the last thing I'll say about this: you can f--k yourself up-- go ahead, go crazy, go have a good time, go hang out all day and night with Ass Violator. Get drunk as hell, blast yourself off with a freakin' airbag, for all I care, but don't f--k your kids up. They don't deserve that. Anyway, guys, sorry I had a Bill Cosby moment there. Some things need to be said. But you know what will always cuss you out over Xbox? The comment question of the day, which comes from a user named, bing!, and she said.. -My comment question of the day is why are you here? -So... why are you here? Leave your interesting or creative responses in the comment section below. But thanks for watching today's episode of =3. I'm Ray William Johnson and I approve this message. So tell me forum, if your life were a song, what would the title be? [Stalkin' Your Mom by Wax playing] Captioned by SpongeSebastian [laughter]

Video Details

Duration: 4 minutes and 43 seconds
Country: United States
Language: English
Producer: Ray William Johnson
Director: Ray William Johnson
Views: 209
Posted by: spongesebastian on Sep 1, 2010

Equals Three with RayWilliamJohnson. (Captioned using UniversalSubtitles.org)

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