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I LIKE TURTLES!!

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-What's happenin' forum? Two turtles doin' it. What else would be happenin'? Now, the funny thing about this video is not the turtles humping, because who hasn't walked in on a couple turtles or their parents? The funny thing is that the turtle on top seems to be saying, "Wow!" It's funny 'cause that's actually what I say. Mainly because I'm surprised that it's really happening. Now, this video got like a quarter million views in a week. Here's the thing, I want you to notice the difference in their reaction. You see, he's all like... "Wow! Wow!" And she's all like, "Meh, I've had better." So, someone sent me this next video and I must admit, I LOL'd but not so much like a "hehehe" more like a "ahahahaha!" Yeah, kinda like that. Yeah, there's this dude and he gets a little frustrated at mini-golf. So, did it do it? Did it work? Did it make you go, "Ahahahah!"? No? Just me. I'm the only ---hole who did that, huh? You mean you didn't even LOL when the ball pegged her right in the melon? -Ridin' this bike while I sing this song Oh, f--k! Anyway, this video was uploaded to YouTube about a year ago, got about 2,000 views, then FailBlog picked it up and got it almost a million views. The problem with this video is that it's faker than Mel Gibson's love for the Jewish community. I don't know. Now, why is this video fake? "It's fake 'cause she's a woman and she's out of the kitchen." No, that joke's old. It's fake 'cause it was apparently part of some Swedish commercial. I don't know, the person who sent it to me told me that. Nice haircut, by the way. "Thank you." Even if it is fake, you gotta admit, it's a good way to get a girl's attention. Just sweeping the ladies right off their feet. And I understand. I once hit a girl with my car to get her attention. And when the lawsuit's over, I'll probably ask her out. All right, this last video--I don't even know how to explain it. I really wanted to review it last week but I didn't get a chance to. So there's this guy who does ice sculptures and there's a reporter trying to interview him. -Look at this, because why is this-- Oh. Oh, my God. I am so sorry. -Dude, are you serious? -Well, I guess that's one way to break the ice. Boom! Did you hear that? That's like the best pun I ever made! Oh-ho-ho-oh, f--k. No, I'm kidding. The video is actually great, especially when the guy says, "Dude, are you serious?" -Dude, are you serious? -Anyone else would've been like, "Oh, Motherf--ker!" And then they would've raped e'erybody in Lincoln Park. And I know the guy says he spent eight hours on the ice sculpture, which is good if you wanted it to look like a sort of frozen rock formation turd. All right, you know what? I gotta call fake on this one too. Notice that after the reporter breaks the ice sculpture, he immediately sticks the microphone in the guy's face to get a reaction. "Excuse me sir, I just f--ked your wife. How does that make you feel?" Yeah, and there you have it. This video is faker than Mel Gibson's love for the black community. I don't know. Wait-wait-wait. This video is faker than that bottom turtle's orgasm. Boom with the terrible joke. But you know what's never terrible? The comment question of the day, which comes from a user named, blaw!, and she said... -My question is, what's your question? -So...what's your question? Leave your interesting or creative responses in the comments section below. But thanks for watching today's episode of =3. I'm Ray William Johnson and I approve this message. Oh guys, real quick, check out the video I did with the Annoying Orange, bing, right there if you haven't seen it yet. I play an angry little retarded fruit, so I play myself I guess. Anyhoo, I'll see you guys in a few days. So tell me forum, when butterflies fall in love, what do they feel in their stomachs? (Stalkin' Your Mom by Wax playing) Captioned by SpongeSebastian

Video Details

Duration: 4 minutes and 9 seconds
Country: United States
Language: English
Producer: Ray William Johnson
Director: Ray William Johnson
Views: 291
Posted by: spongesebastian on Aug 10, 2010

Equals Three with RayWilliamJohnson. (Captioned using UniversalSubtitles.org)

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