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What about the Jews?

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Hi everybody, I've been asked by a few people why I criticise Muslims and Christians, but not Jews. This is possibly because, of the three dogmas in the children of Abraham - Muslims, Jews and Christians - I like the Jews the best. When I say I like them, I think all three religions are an insult to humanity, but Jews don't do quite as much complaining and privilege-seeking as the other two dogmas. And, more importantly, whereas Muslims and Christians want everybody else to believe what they believe, Jews don't give a damn what you believe, as long as you leave them alone. And I like that. On the other hand, I have heard a rumour that Israel is secretly controlled by Jews, and I'm not sure I like the sound of that. I'm talking about proper Jews, obviously, not the ordinary everyday man in the street sort of Jew, but the ultra orthodox hardcore boys who still attack people for whistling or gathering sticks upon the sabbath, the guys who would rather they were still living 4000 years ago, apart from a brief excursion into 18th century Russia for some clothes. And this surprises me, because I had always assumed that the Christians were really in charge, because they control America, and America controls Israel. We know, for example, that not all Zionists are Jews. There are a number of influential Christian Zionists who would like nothing better than for the Jews to rebuild their temple in Jerusalem because they believe that this will herald the second coming of Christ, and, as an added bonus, the final destruction of those pesky Christ-killing Jews. That's right, the ones who won't convert, apparently Christ is going to come and show Hitler and the Catholic Church how it should have been done. Meanwhile, the political situation in Israel is like a knotted rope; the harder they try to pull it apart, the tighter it gets. And this is because elements on both sides remain vigilant against any possible outbreak of peace; Islamists on the one hand, settlement-building Jews on the other. In other words, the people motivated most strongly by their religious beliefs. What a surprise. Given the history of the Jews, it's easy to understand why they would want their own autonomous Jewish state. But the problem is it's in the wrong place, because if there was any justice in this world, Israel would currently occupy half of Germany, but Israel is not really about justice, is it? It's really about Jerusalem, which is really about scripture and prophecy, which, as we know, is really about insanity. Jerusalem, of course, is a sacred city to all three dogmas in the children of Abraham, which frankly is the best argument I've heard for bulldozing the place, pushing all the rubble into the sea, and then sowing salt in the ground so that nothing will grow there for a thousand years. But right now the Jews happen to control it, and the Christians are very happy about this because they know how much this pisses off the Muslims. The Christians are taking this opportunity to help rub the Jews in the Muslims' faces, because they haven't forgotten the humiliation they suffered just 800 short years ago in the Crusades, and now it's payback time. And the Jews know they're being used like this, of course, but they also know how much the Muslims really hate them being there, and the whole thing presumably appeals to their famous Jewish sense of humour. Which is looks like they're going to need, because the president of Iran, Mr. Ahmadinejad, appears to have committed himself, not to a mental hospital, as you might expect, but to developing nuclear weapons. He claims his nuclear programme is for peaceful purposes. He doesn't say whether this includes wiping Israel off the map, a desire he has expressed quite forcefully in the past, but I think the Israelis believe it does, and that's really all that matters, because we know that Israel has nuclear weapons, and we're pretty sure it would use them if its existence was seriously threatened. So I think we can all safely assume that Israel is not going to disappear any time soon without a nuclear war, which would be a disaster for the Middle East. It would turn the whole region into a desert. But if Iran is determined to get nuclear weapons, what can we do about it? Realistically, I mean what do we do, invade Iran, and get bogged down in a long bloody land war with them, when we already know from experience that they've got lots of cannon fodder - I mean people. And why should be even care, when Israel has ignored so many United Nations resolutions telling them to get out of the occupied territories, which they just can't bring themselves to do because of Jerusalem, and the temple, and scripture, and prophecy, and the fact that they'd have an awful lot of very angry religious Jews on their hands. Because peace in the Middle East, well it's a lovely dream in theory, but as people of the book, we have to live in the real world of miracles and divine revelation, unfortunately. It's just reality, I'm afraid. I think the Jews would do themselves a huge favour if they came to their senses and let go of Jerusalem. It doesn't belong to them, and they're only holding on to it because of religion, which is the worst possible reason to do anything on this planet. They say the shortest distance between two points is a straight line. Well, it's a straight line between religious politics and bloodshed. Always has been, always will be. Keep the Jewish state, by all means. I like the Jewish state. I've been there, I like the place, I like the people. But you don't need Jerusalem. You're bigger than that. The Jewish state has proved itself. It's not to be trifled with. We get that now. But Jerusalem is not a Jewish town; it's an Arab town. And it's time we all started to acknowledge that, and live in reality, before reality imposes itself on all of us in the most unpleasant way imaginable. So please, Jews, do us all a favour. Give it back, and help put a stop to this madness. The whole world will thank you for it, and you know what? You'll probably end up as the most popular people on the planet. And wouldn't that be a turn up for the books? Shalom. You know it makes sense.

Video Details

Duration: 6 minutes and 16 seconds
Country: UK
Language: English
Director: Pat Condell
Views: 3,570
Posted by: patcondell on Oct 3, 2007

Recorded June 29th 2007.
A few words about the chosen people.
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